It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Randomize