Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
