ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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