I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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