Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
