Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
