Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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