From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
