Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
