It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
