i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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