She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
