just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
