I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
