What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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