I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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