No stitches, just platelets and will power
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Houston, we have a squirter
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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