Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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