she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I have feelings that need drinking.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
He did a backflip because drugs
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