I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Even my vagina gasped.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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