Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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