would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
