you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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