i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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