somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I have demons in me.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
