Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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