I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
