I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Fuck appropriateness.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
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