I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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