So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
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