i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
