I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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