checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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