I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
