The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
