I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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