who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
