Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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