ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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