Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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