You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
