So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
