There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You pole danced in your parka.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
