Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
