I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Success! We fucked roommates!
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
