1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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