I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
