Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
