You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
