What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I just found a bag of teeth...
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
